Well I’ve been sick with a cold the last few days….that’s been annoying. But it’s also interesting because I usually NEVER get sick anymore. I was thinking about this yesterday while walking a dog, I was remembering all the times Id gotten sick as a teen, course I was drinking and taking horrible care of myself. But I would get sick at least twice a year. And it was HELL. This time it’s been wayyyyyy better. Not saying it’s been pleasant by any means. but it’s been better. It just goes to show you how good care can go a long way.
I was also thinking about something else not related to health. I was thinking about all the s*it I’ve done in my life and how I probably HAD to do all the things I did. What if I needed to drink? What if I had to get sober on my own? What if I had to go through all the things that I did in order to get here? What if everything was a lesson? What if it still is? What if things had gone differently? Where would I have ended up? These are questions I ask myself daily. I’m learning to find peace in that. I’m learning to find peace in not having all the answers. I don’t want them. More importantly I don’t need them. I don’t think I ever will.